林师而's blog

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Decision finally made =)

Reading through my previous posts, kinda make me look stupid.

I should really just die die learn this up.

To un-see what i have seen, un-hear what's heard. To make me happier. Pretendance is important. That's one biggest weakness i had since young.

Why must i always voice out? Should keep mum and leave...

October 4th!

Fresh new chapter :)

Shi Er says @ 6:38 PM

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

To make me feel better...

I covered my ears with earpiece...
Reading newspaper?!

Hmm.. So unlike me. But yeah, i have to be un-me so to survive through this month here. Last month.

Just take it.
And leave it.

Shi Er says @ 8:14 PM

Friday, August 19, 2011

Lies over lies. When is it going to stop?
Leopard never change it's spots. Probably my heart just stop beating. Dead by the random hurtful hurling shoots thrown by you.
No one knows what is going on behind the door.

I will escape. Maybe just like what u said, I will hate you.
You ask me not to.
Let me tell you, its impossible.

Shi Er says @ 12:09 PM

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Somehow I know you will be reading. What you believe is what you conceive. I don't believe in what you said. And there gOes the same to what you intend to believe in me.. U think I lie to u? No! I seriously went one altitude cos I been wanting to go there since a
Long time. U promise to go with me. But I doubt u will ever do so. Not a single promise u made to me before right? I will do all these with others then.

Somehow u may think you are of value and people are chasing behind your steps. Yeah. True. But believe me, it's only for the short while, not from the true heart. Feel it and you will know it.
True heart does not equal to what you think.
The knowledge is not enough to your understanding.

Shi Er says @ 1:49 AM

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I had enough.

He thinks i am not as of much use i guess.
He treat any other lady (he thinks he can make use of) the same.

I don't think i am over sensitive.
But what i read through all the body language and the language they use, i am not wrong.

I think i will head for somewhere at least i am treated with respect. Rather than to put up with his FUCKED UP attitude.
Been receiving negativities every single shit days.

Lies been everywhere.
True that i hate you still.

Shi Er says @ 7:16 PM

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

I am in a good mood! It just feel so good when he is busy and don't have much time to talk to me!!!

No time to Communicate means no time to say anything bad about me. Frequent scoldings give me low esteem.. Especially those vulgarities that shoot right into my face unreasonably.
I am so happy! Get to knock off early finally:)))

Shi Er says @ 10:39 PM

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Reading his ex blog, makes me feel i am out of the world.

I don't believe in long-lasting love anymore.

And yeah, i went through her stage before, which i want to believe every love is true, will not be as complicated as what the adults always say. There will not be any boredom during a relationship, you can endure the person's negativity as long as you really love him.

But after i know someone who is much mature and older than me, he really made me look at the picture clearer. And this reminds me not to be an ostrich anymore. I should not hide from the ugliness of human.

Human can never be satisfied, can never be perfect.

Change is constant.

And you have to be prepared for change. Change in yourself and the change in others.

Jeff keeps changing. But i guess he is totally unaware of his changes. And he won't admit to his changes.

I change too.

Now, being back to single. And after the bad breakup at Butter Fact with jeff. I am awake i guess. Not returning to the pile of emo-shit status and no more crying to my dog anymore.

I should just cherish every people around me.

I wish the best future for Jeff too.

Hoping he can be more mature after army.

And i will rest 2 years being single. Will try to find back the courage to face guys again.

Shi Er says @ 7:03 PM